For years and years and years and years people have said “once a cheater, always a cheater“, and yet it’s a lesson women still haven’t seemed to learn.
I have a male friend who is the perfect example. He’s a great friend but a horrible boyfriend and it’s the very reason why I would never in a million years date him.
Just after I first met him, he started dating a beautiful blonde. She looked like a real-life barbie doll. She was sweet as could be. Within the first month of their relationship, he had cheated on her with a stripper. Why? Did she do something wrong? No, of course not. He cheated on her because he could and that just who he was.
A year into their relationship he meets a girl at work leaves the pretty blonde for the new girl. They get serious, or so she thought. A year later, he meets someone new – again while he’s still with the previous girlfriend. So he leaves the girl he met at work for this new girl.
This new girl is a few years older than him, but as he put it, she’s so mature. She was a waitress at a strip club. That relationship didn’t work out because one night, while at a sports bar, he met a bartender who was half his age.
Guess what happened? He cheated on her too. In fact, he cheated on her just a week into their relationship.
This story isn’t unusual. That’s the thing about guys who are cheaters. Cheaters always cheat. That’s a part of who they are.
It’s not about you or even your relationship – it’s just who they are. A leopard can’t change his spots. He is what he is and a cheater is what he is – a cheater.
My grandmother used to say, “If a cheat says he won’t cheat on you what he means is, next time he’ll work harder so you won’t catch him doing it.”
So before you get to caught up in dating a guy, ask yourself this … are you dating a cheater?
If a guy has cheated before he met you, he’s going to cheat after you.
Once a cheater, always a cheater!
So do yourself a favor – don’t get serious about a guy that is only going to break your heart. They aren’t easy to find but there are guys out there, who don’t have this personality flaw. Hold out until you find him. He’s out there … waiting for you. Don’t give up until you find him.
For some reason, women tend to think that a man will change for them because they are really in love and that all the times prior to now were just because he wasn’t with the right woman (you). It’s this weird delusion all women have about the men in our lives.
There is something fundamentally wrong with the kind of man who cheats. He’s damaged beyond repair. No matter what you think, you can’t fix him. Even if he loves you with all of his heart, he will still cheat on you. Why? Because somewhere along the way, he learned something that just isn’t right about love, and relationships.
Cheating is the most hurtful and disrespectful thing you could do to someone you claim to love. Yet the kind of guy who cheats will do it time and time again. You aren’t ever going to change him. It’s just the kind of guy that he is.
Cheating is a choice, it’s not something you “accidentally” do. You make a conscious decision to cheat and nothing you can ever do will change the person who does it. All the relationship counseling in the world won’t change him either. It’s not that he doesn’t love you or want to spend the rest of his life with you – he may very well see you as his dream girl.
But a cheater will still cheat on you.
It isn’t your fault. There is nothing you did that will make him cheat or stay faithful. It’s not about you, or even your relationship, it’s about him.